In other news, Satan has finally responded to Apostle Arome Osayi's claims, and his publicist says he was not even in the country.
The apostle described detailed conversations and warned his congregation about the devil's plans for the nation.
(laughing out loud like James Brown)
But Satan has now issued a statement through his media team, denying any communication with the apostle.
"Satan has been on leave since December 2024 and has not visited Nigeria since the End SARS protests. Any claim of communication during this period is false and should be disregarded,"
The statement read.
Sources close to Satan say he has been resting in an undisclosed location and has only been monitoring Nigeria through social media like everyone else. His team also clarified that he has no plans to return until the naira stabilizes, adding:
"Even the devil needs a break from Nigeria's economy."
(shakes head like Charly Boy)
Satan's team has reportedly been receiving an unusual number of interview requests since Apostle Arome's sermon went viral. His publicist told reporters, "We appreciate the interest, but Satan is currently unavailable for comment. He is focused on his mental health and has been advised to avoid Nigerian religious debates for his own peace." He also confirmed that Satan has muted the apostle's name on all platforms.
Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo said he is tired of single women above 40. Read here: Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo Says a 42-Year-Old Woman Rejected a Good Man Because of His Haircut, She's Reportedly Dating His Barber. Listen to my podcast. Why Am I Still Single? Available right here on checkedgar.com.
Source: Satan's media aide, Buro Bara, who confirmed he has been on leave since December 2024 and is not taking calls from Nigerian pastors.
