Davido Performed At Coachella. He Has Since Refused To Come Back To Nigeria.

In other news, Davido performed at Coachella. He has since refused to come back to Nigeria.

Now, let me be clear. This is not a rumour. This is not speculation. This is a man who tasted something and cannot unsee what he has seen.

Davido made his Coachella debut last weekend. Ninety thousand people in the crowd. Lights everywhere. The kind of stage where the floor vibrates, and your ancestors can feel it. He went, he performed, he delivered and conquered.

(claps like Osita Iheme)

And then he landed back in Nigeria.

NEPA took light before his car left the airport. His generator developed a fault. His estate road had a pothole that swallowed the front tyre. His neighbour's music player won't stop playing Wizkid's new songs. His data finished on the expressway.

By Tuesday morning, Davido had submitted a formal application to become a permanent resident of Indio, California. The small desert city where Coachella is held. Population 91,000. Zero fuel queues. Zero NEPA. Zero potholes.

(Sighs like Chiwetalu Agu)

The Indio City Council has confirmed they received the application but noted they were "unavailable and unsure what a Davido is". They have, however, listened to "Unavailable" and described it as "pretty good".

Nigerian authorities have responded by promising to fix the road in front of his house by 2031.

Davido has not responded. He is believed to be somewhere with stable electricity, staring at the wall in peace.

Edgar doesn't lie.

Source: A reliable source close to Davido who asked to remain anonymous and then immediately posted about it on their Instagram story.

If you enjoyed this story, you will also enjoy the time Portable was given ₦20 million for a specific job and spent it on something completely different. Read it here: Portable Has Already Spent Burna Boy's ₦20 Million. You Won't Believe What He Did With It.

And if any of this is making you question your life choices, so am I. Listen to my podcast, Why Am I Still Single? Available right here on checkedgar.com.